Obituary Assignment

Tiffany Alcorn, 25, passed away on July 4th, 2015, in a freak accident involving a badly aimed roman candle. Tiffany was said by her family to have been standing next to a large selection of fireworks meant to help the family celebrate Independence Day when her younger brother Dalton Briles, age 12, tried to shoot her with the roman candle in question. He missed his target, instead setting off dozens of fireworks just as Tiffany started to pick up a pack of sprinklers. Her step-dad said that she was dazzling in her final moments, right up until a final explosion sent everyone in the vicinity sprawling face-first into the dirt. So far, the biggest piece of her that has been found has been her right foot, still in a charred sneaker. The devestated family nevertheless stated that, "Wherever she is now, she's probably laughing herself sick at how she went. She always said she would probably die in some sort of freak accident."
Born to Kenneth Alcorn and Connie Briles on January 30, 1990, Tiffany is survived by her sisters Brittany Alcorn and Sarah Briles; and brothers Ryian Briles, Dalton Briles, and Matthew Alcorn. She was living in New Albany in an apartment at the time of her death.
Tiffany was known all over the world for her recent invention of the world's first instant teleportation device. She said she made the first for purely lazy reasons, stating that it took too long to drive anywhere and that walking between the small rooms of her apartment was annoying.
Tiffany's funeral will be held as soon as the rest of her is found.